Matt shares the Quantum Apology Model with Alan; the AAMR method helps leaders – and anyone – apologize with sincerity and grace in order to improve positive relationships and move forward from conflict or misunderstanding.
Related posts:
Leaders apologize, and teach others how to do so
posted in: Communication, Integrity, Modeling Behavior
7
Jessica Beebe
Jessica Beebe liked this on Facebook.
Christopher Blanchard
Christopher Blanchard liked this on Facebook.
Jacque McCurdy
Jacque McCurdy liked this on Facebook.
Samantha Jean Boyd
Really like this model. I’m wondering why you feel that there is a difference between “I’m sorry” and “I apologize.” Can you elaborate? Also, I think you caught it basically, but I agree that saying you’ll “never” do something again is probably not the best idea. Saying you’ll never be late again is a hard promise to keep. Great vlog!
Matt Pries
Great question about the difference between sorry and apologize. This was something the folks involved with Quantum Learning/Teaching instilled in me during training. You are not a “sorry” person. Synonyms for sorry include sad and miserable. There is power in saying “I apologize.” People are used to hearing “I’m sorry.” Alan hit on this a bit with the playground reference: “say you’re sorry”. There’s just not as much weight in it. When people hear “I apologize”, there seems to be a recognition that the speaker is being certain to articulate in a clear and different-than-normal way that s/he recognizes s/he is wrong and is ready to move on to the “make it right” step. Give it a try . . . it’s packed with power. Thanks for watching and responding!
Alan Feirer
Thanks for adding to this, Samantha and Matt. I have wondered a bit myself about the “hair-splitting” between those two words – and my previous posts on apologies testify to that. Thanks for teaching me, and others, these great insights.
Charlie
You taught me that almost 20 years ago, Matt. I remember you replying to a camper who said “I’m sorry” with words to the effect of, “No. You apologize, and I accept your apology. But don’t make a statement about what you are, as if your mistake made you different or worse. Make a statement of action that you’re offering me an apology.”
“Huh,” I thought, “that’s kind of a nitpicky semantics poin… whoa. He’s exactly right.” I’ve tried to follow that advice ever since.
Fun to see you guys together – I dig this video blog thing!